Trusting God in Singleness
There is no denying that it can be difficult to trust God in singleness. This simple statement of trusting in God holds so much weight I could almost be crushed by it. I think of the very nature of God as an all-powerful, all-holy, all-knowing, infinite God and wonder what’s not to trust?
Because God is holy and in fact the only holy being there is, He is, therefore, the only being truly worthy of complete trust. He created the entire universe, along with me and every other thing that has ever existed, so, He knows how I should function and what should be added or subtracted to me to make me closer to His divine image. So what’s the problem?
Trusting God in Singleness that He will Give me the Desire of My Heart- My Story
The problem is trusting that he will give me the desire of my heart, let me explain. I trust God to a certain degree. Like I trust Him to supply all my needs according to His riches in glory. I trust Him to be a deliverer, a healer, a way maker, and most of all a Father that loves me. It's only the desires I desperately want, that limit my trust in God.
God is a God of order. He orchestrates every single detail of existence, which is amazing right?! Right! But what happens when the thing I desperately desire is not the thing I can have right now, or even at all because it conflicts with God’s strategic plan or order for my life? That very question is the one that causes instability in my trust in God. I often wonder, “Does this desire line up with the will of God?”
If our desires line up with the will of God, then I have no reason to doubt that I’ll receive said desire. I’m reminded of the scripture, “The blessing of the LORD, it maketh rich, and he addeth no sorrow with it” Proverbs 10:22. Every blessing from the Lord has no accompanied sorrow, which to me, translates as no sadness or turmoil. So, when God blesses a thing, it’s amazing and beyond compare.
“There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female (single or married), for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Galatians 3:28 ESV (emphasis added)
Our marital status does not categorize us differently in God's eyes. We are valuable because we are a part of His creation. And Jesus is the reason we are welcomed into God's family
My Singleness Makes Me Question Whether I Can Trust God
Let’s say, for instance, a single girl wants to be married. Now marriage within itself is ordained by God and was created for us to be fruitful and multiple, and for us to mirror the love God has for His church. It is a good desire and in accordance with God’s plan for mankind. But if said single woman is still filled with loneliness, bitterness, strife, and such, that woman is not in a position to be a wife. Does that mean that woman would never be a wife? Absolutely not! God wants us to come forth as pure gold so whatever process He wants to take us through so that we can be sure, He’ll do it. The desire to be a wife cannot, should not, and will not override the need to be purged and sanctified. When you’re precious to God, he will do whatever is needed to get the greatest glory from your life.
Most single women are uncertain about if or when they will get married. It can be a heavy burden to bear. They doubt God's judgment and their ability to endure the waiting period. Can we rely on God while we are single?
Is it feasible to put your love life in God's hands? Is it possible that our desires are flawed? Could be. The truth is that even when we achieve our goals, we experience some degree of emptiness. Regardless of our marital situation, this is a frequent condition Being married does not always make you feel less empty. For a while, it might cover it up or conceal it, but ultimately the emptiness reappears
I brought up that illustration to drive home the point that if I haven’t been purified enough to obtain my desire, I can lean on my own understanding and believe that I won't ever obtain my desire, which leads to the lack of trust in God’s willingness to give me my desires. So, what do I do? Great question! A part of what I do, I already mentioned. I try not to lean on my own understanding. There’s a popular statement that says, “delayed not denied”. I hold on to that phrase because I know that just because the promise is not currently in front of me, doesn’t mean it's not coming.
Dear God, Fill My Heart With Your Desires
Sometimes, I wish to wide open my heart and fill it with divine light. I wish to hold all His teachings and His Commands in my heart. I desire to look like a true pupil of all his teachings. Additionally, I pray for God to purify my heart and to put His desires in my heart. I love this prayer because if my heart is pure, then I can receive God’s desires and if my desires line up with God’s desires then He will give them to me because His Word says, He’ll give me the desires of my heart.
Epilogue
See how that works together? It's one of those things that can be applied to every area of your life. Mine just happens to be my singleness. Yours could be your financial stability and someone else’s could be their child’s salvation. Whatever it may be for you, I encourage you to Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart… every concern, worry, sensitive place, hard topic, everything affecting your heart; give it to God. Lean not to your own understanding, and He will direct your path. He will lead and guide you on how to navigate anything before you. Be encouraged babies! Be blessed and be a blessing to others.